Signs of Normalcy

I know the title of this post would induce a 4 hour lecture from my therapist and all PI professionals, so let me start by acknowledging that I am very much aware that Ana is 2 weeks PI and 1 week home and she most definitely isn't a 'normal' kid in such a short amount of time. That being said, it is actually resembling normal around here now!! Normal doesn't mean "pretty" with 4 kids. But the good news includes:

1) Ana cries in pain. Yes, that is such good news. Ana was born into a crazy crazy stressful life and it didn't calm down until she was 1 year old and in the orphanage. Her brain was bathed in cortisol constantly as she was on high alert. One of the side effects from this was that Ana even a few days ago fell backwards and didn't seem to feel it. She didn't acknowledge the pain at all. Normal things that would induce a wail in any other child didn't phase her. At first I thought she had that genetic condition where you don't feel any pain. But she doesn't. This is a side effect of the constant vigilance her brain has been on (all the cortisol). But today Ana cried in pain multiple times.

2) Ana screams at Aidan. Ok, yes we have to work on this, but as a first step I am thrilled! She has been the victim all her life and she started off this past week continuing her role. Not any more. Girl has lungs! Now, we just have to teach her words! (And, her brother needs to learn to keep toys out of her face and give her some personal space.)

3) Ana will take toys away from Aidan and work to control the situation..... actually, she plans on controlling the whole house. This is very PI and I know bio kids have the same issues but they have them for different reasons. Either way, I smile in delight as she tries to manipulate us because it provides us with an opportunity to help her learn that parents are the boss. What a beautiful lesson. "Ana, you can relax. Mommy and Daddy are in control. You get to be a kid and I will take care of the rest. Test it whenever you want, and I will always let you know that I am still in charge and you can still relax and be a kid."

4) Ana loves to play. Ana loves to push her stroller and play with toys. Ana loves to play "Where is Ana?" and she puts her hands over my eyes and we play "Where is mommy?" She likes to squeeze people's noses and see what sound they will make.

5) Ana learns fast. She can now climb on all the furniture alone. She knows how to open a door. She can climb up our tall slide alone and slide down. She can make all her toys work pushing buttons, flipping switches sliding levers. Aidan is the perfect role model and she is a wonderful student.

6) Ana can eat. And eat.... and eat.....
She has favorite foods like strawberry frosted mini wheats and she has food she doesn't like- like raw veggies (like I said- a normal Robson!) We are sneaking vitamin drops into her applesauce. We also mix in 2 scoops of Similac with Iron baby powder with each bowl of porridge. She loves to eat cheese of any kind as long as it is solid. She doesn't like yogurt or milk. She is very much like a 1 year old: when we eat something, she wants to try it. We have managed to get all the food groups into her diet and she tries new foods each day. We are very pleased with meal time and her eating habits. Between the wonderful nutrition she is getting and the multiple trips outside for walks each day, we should be kicking the Rickets rump :)

7) Ana can sleep.. Thank You Dear Lord!! So far sleep is not an issue for us. Ana sleeps in her crib and loves it. We always rock some before she lays down. Sometimes she falls asleep in my arms, but most of the time I get to lay her in her bed and sit in the room with her until she falls asleep. She naps every day at 12:30, just like she will at school. We go to her room at night at 7pm to start the bedtime routine and she is normally asleep before 8pm.. Now, if I could just get my 10 and 13 year olds to go to bed at a reasonable hour without a fuss.

8) Ana is ticklish all the time now. Do you remember that she would be ticklish sometimes and not others? Well now she is ALWAYS ready for a good tickle giggle. That's good when you are a tickle octopus mommy like me!


9) Ana likes to get out and explore more! First of all, the stroller is Ana's favorite spot in the whole world. She would go on walks all day long. But we have ventured beyond our little neighborhood now. We have taken Aidan to the Doctor. We went to Lowe's. She has ridden in the Jeep with the roof off. We went to buy a bed frame. And, we made it to Publix this week.
Publix yesterday caused a few terror moments for her. It was the first place she had been besides our home. But today we were forced to go to the Dr. It was so good that her first visit was to watch Aidan be examined. You would have thought that with her back ground (hospitals were not a happy place at all) she would have flipped out. But her pupils never dilated or constricted. She never showed any signs of stress. And, trust me, I was watching very closely. She has been doing so well we decided to take her to Lowes. She did great. She wanted to touch everything. So we kept the Jeep ride going. We chose the Jeep on purpose because it is another way to get some sunshine.
We weren't gone very long. That probably helped in the success department.

10) Ana has some preference for people. She definitely offers indiscriminate hugs to females who speak English. We are going to have to work on that. But, she has a family hierarchy. Mom and Dad can touch her. She prefers me, but Dad will do too. Corbin wants to hold her. Nyet! Corbin and Collin both get the shriek of denial when they try to offer even a hug. Aidan on the other hand is more than welcome to grab ahold of her and assist her in her criminal activities. He will boost her up so she can get to something off limits. She gives him the big thumbs up when he is useful, otherwise- it is the shriek of denial. Men and other kids all cause her to come to me or Ian and cling but watch cautiously. She doesn't hyperventilate anymore, but she does want to be in my arms.


So there are my top 10 reasons Ana is becoming a normal Robson kiddo.

In other news, Irma Shultz came by today and tried to be Irma-Clause. She had big plans on dropping off goodies and running. Fortunately I caught her before she could get away and introduced her to our angel. Irma doesn't know what an inspiration she has been. With 3 kids ranging in age from 3-6 I constantly tell myself, "Irma did it with 3. I CAN handle 2. I CAN do this." Now, Irma does it, raises preschoolers who are confident, caring and very smart. She also is a queen bee volunteer and she looks amazing while doing it. I am lowering the bar a tad. Can I just get everyone fed healthy meals and to sleep at night. Let's put the bar down at 'safe and healthy' for a while! Anyone who is under the illusion that I won't be returning to work can wake up from that fog right now. Hats off to the at home mommies!! I bow down before you! I on the other hand am already ready to get back into my classroom. I love having time that is my own and afterwards looking forward to seeing my kids in the afternoon. I love being challenged mentally and feeling like the dirty dishes and laundry are just not on the radar of priorities. When I stay at home, I can't balance fun and work. It is hard to let myself relax because I am surrounded by things that need to be done. But, when I work, I cherish my family and free time and fingerprints on sliding doors and dirty floors just don't effect me nearly as much. In fact, if it weren't for the maid (who I can only afford because I work) the fingerprints might be there for ages. Time and time again, I wish I could be that mom who I admire so much. The one that stays at home and seems to have it all together. Hats off to the Wonder Women of the World!

Irma brought us all a cookie bouquet. We each enjoyed munching on ourselves as a snack today. She also brought Ana a seahorse that plays lullabies. Ana has enjoyed it all day and I know it is going to end up being part of our night time routine. Thanks Irma!!

DD Swope also stopped by to drop off Peanut. Collin is having a boy party upstairs tonight while Corbin is at a friend's. We agreed to the party as long as they stay upstairs until the babies go to bed. Fortunately, we have a U shaped home and the big kids can be upstairs on their side of the house and we can't hear them down on our side of our house. Ana and Aidan shouldn't have a clue that anything is out of the ordinary. And, Collin gets to have a bit of his life back. They have big picnic/ x-box live plans for the night I believe.

Aidan's crib came down. I explained to Aidan that Ryan Kaliban had loaned him the crib and that now that he has a big boy bed, it is time for us to return the crib to Ryan. That actually worked for Aidan, so I need to call Angela and make plans for us to bring Ryan his crib and for Aidan to have a thank you gift for him. Otherwise, I think he has plans to keep it in his room until he is 18. If anyone wants some beautiful boy bedding, I have a bumper pad and a dust ruffle.

Truth be told, Aidan is in need of some therapeutic play and intervention as much as Ana. I think the combo of moving out of the baby room and loosing Yolanda and Gertrudes, being potty trained, Mommy being gone so much of the summer, his brothers being gone the other part of the summer, Nana taking care of him on and off, Daddy switching it up and introducing another routine, moving into a big boy bed and now incorporating a younger sibling into the mix while going to big boy school with his brothers (IDS is from 3 yrs old to 8th grade) the boy is due a break. The last 3 months have been doozies for him! I am so grateful that Ian is such a great daddy and I am not doing this solo. Ian is on Paternity leave and doing more than his part helping Aidan and Ariana to heal and adjust.

So, to any other APs out there who are reading getting ready to bring home a child of their own, I offer you today's tid bit of advise.

Just sing.

It is my manipulative tool I mastered teaching little people.

Just sing.

It calms them down. It can induce laughter. It certainly distracts.

Just sing.

The good news is that they will think you are a rock star until they are teenagers and wise up. Until then, when the going gets tough... make up a song... deliver your directions or just think out loud...

Just sing.


Michelle