My "freak out" passed. I can remember having crazy dreams and panic attacks on a daily basis when I was pregnant. Especially with my first and my last. With Corbin, I thought we were too young and we could never afford it. With Aidan, I was too old and having to take all kinds of tests to make sure he was OK. (Volatile topic I know, but it was important to me that if he needed help in utero he got it, and if he was going to need help in the hospital we had the best ready and waiting). In the end, they were all just fine and the best choices of my life after marrying Ian. So, I guess it isn't too surprising that my paper pregnancy had a panic attack and a weird dream.

I will say, that I am enjoying reading again. Back in the fall, I read a lot so we could make an educated decision. I took all kinds of classes. I am back in that same spot again now. I took 3 more online classes. 2 more and I will have taken every class Adoption Partners has to offer. I am also reading some books I found at the local book store while I wait for an Amazon order to arrive.

We have a 3 day weekend this weekend so we are taking the boys to Disney. I am a nice mom. Corbin has a friend coming as does Collin. I will have 5 boys and one man on my little "vacation". Actually, this is pretty normal for us and I know it will be lots of fun. I wonder what Ari is going to think of a house full of men. I call them the Rat Pack because they go from refrigerator to refrigerator in the neighborhood cleaning each out and leaving little messes behind to let you know they had been there.

I can't believe it is time to start focusing on the end of the school year. This will be a very hard class to let go of. They really were my inspiration to adopt from Russia. With 3 adopted from the area, 1 one biological child from there and 3 others adopted outside the EE it was a first for me. We are planning our final class unit so we can use May to make sure we have plenty of time to put together end of the year books and plan a great Good Bye Luau for our kids. On top of all of that, I am starting to think ahead to next fall. It seems pretty obvious that my plan to get Ari before the summer won't happen. So, I will be out on "maternity leave" for at least 6 weeks.

I also call Ian daily now to ask if we have heard from the loan officer. We really need to get moving on our addition. It was supposed to be done next month and we haven't even broken ground! I have all of this stuff for Ariana's room and I can't wait to set it up. I have also been thinking about Aidan's room. I think I want to add a twin bed next to his crib so we can start napping in a big boy bed this summer. I don't know. Potty training and big boy bed might be too much. I will probably put the twin in there and if he asks to sleep on it he can and if not, he can stay in his adorable crib. If it were me, I'd pick the crib.

Our summer calendar is already filling up. I want to go see a friend in North Carolina and one in Tenn. But, I am not sure when it will happen. I have time, but Corbin and Collin have quite the agenda. In June, we are taking them to Atlantis when the Russian's celebrate Independence Day. (seems safe to travel). Then, my parents are taking them on a cruise for a week. In July, we traditionally go to the Ron Jon Resort in Cape Canaveral (highly recommended). Then, they go to summer camp in our home state of Texas. They get back in early August. Right now Corbin and Collin will be at home for 33 days this summer (only 3 in July), and it is only April. It looks like an Aidan-Mommy-construction worker summer. Hopefully we can cap it off with a family trip to Russia to pick up our angel, Ariana.

Well, I need to go and shower and pack up the crew for our trip. Ian was on American, so he ended up having to fly straight to Orlando with all the cancellations happening. I have to pack for him as well as myself and Aidan. Fortunately the big guys want to pack for themselves. Let's hope I can get it all done in an hour and 15 minutes and be gone by 10am. The good news is our housekeeper is going to stay here this weekend and do some really deep cleaning on the house :) It really needs it.

My goal is to read a good novel, laugh with the guys and come back relaxed to a clean home!!
Now, that is a weekend!

I hope everyone has their dream weekend too.

Remember to say a prayer for all of the orphans in Russia, the caregivers who nurture them, and the communities that support them. And, please say a special prayer for the support teams of our agencies. That they are treated with dignity and respect. That they are valued for their contribution. That they find peace and joy in their work. And they are supported in their efforts. Normally rational people become irrational when it comes to their children. And, these men and women get to play middle man between the crazy parents and bureaucrats. What a job! God Bless them.